The next morning, I awoke sleepily, the events of the night before slowly returning. I turned to my left to find him awake and looking at me pensively. I stretched my arms out above my head. “So”, I asked with a smile, in my early morning voice, “what do you think of your first service to your Master?”
At seeing my positive demeanor, he suddenly seemed to become less tense. “I was going to ask you that!” he retorted. “I thought I’d disappointed you, and you were angry with me”.
“Oh, baby, my poor baby. You didn’t disappoint” I said quite honestly, “It was your first time. I knew you’d get a failing grade, but it was important that we begin the process of getting you properly trained.”
“However, I’ll be less forgiving in the future, if you decide to commit to me. It’s critical that you understand that I will own you. This isn’t a game where we just laugh about your mistakes afterwards. It’s black and white. You do what you’re told. You serve with passion and gratitude. You do it well and I’ll take great care of you. It couldn’t be simpler. I promise you no head games. Well, there may be some head games during sex, but I’ll not mind-fuck you in general daily life. So yes, you failed, but it was to be expected, and I understand. I still want your service. Now, tell me the rest of your thoughts, as surely you have others.”
I waited patiently for him to form his response.
He looked pensive as he slowly began to explain. “I’m not sure. I’m still processing. Other than being concerned that I’d not pleased you, my general feelings are joy, pride, and sexual excitement. I woke with a massive erection about an hour ago. I can’t remember the last time I had such an erection in the morning. But no worries, I didn’t touch ‘your cock’” he smiled.
“That’s admirable” I responded with a sly smile, “but our agreement was that you’d serve me until midnight. You’re free to masturbate now if you like. But to your point, if we marry, that cock is mine for as long as we stay married. Masturbation without prior approval will be a major offense”. I paused slightly for effect and looked sternly into his eyes, “a major…fucking…offense”. I waited, staring at him, to see the weight of what I was saying sink in. “So…” I asked gingerly, “how do you feel this morning compared to how you felt before we played last night? Does this scare you off, or do you think it’s something you might consider?”
He paused for a moment, reflecting, and then turned to look right at me. “Right now, this minute, I can’t imagine us any other way. I can see you’re happy, and I know I’m happy. But I’d like to think on things a little longer and, if possible, discuss more?” he asked inquiringly.
“Absolutely!” I replied, “but do prepare yourself. I took it easy on you this time. The core of it, you experienced last night. But when I take full control, I’ll let my dominance and my lust, in and out of the bedroom, take me where they wish. I know we’ve played with things in the past, but I’ll make no apologies for what I want in bed… or out of it for that matter”.
“Like what, for example?” he asked sincerely.
I took a deep breath, and looked him squarely in the eyes. “I’ve no intention of creating a list for you. I will not be handcuffed to what I might say now. My desires and interests may change over time, and I expect to be able to follow them and express myself as I wish.”
“I’m truly not trying to be mean when I say this, but I’ll do whatever the fuck I want. If that open-ended nature makes you uncomfortable, then that’s something you need to carefully consider.”
I looked him directly in the eye, a smile no longer on my face. “Here’s the thing that you really need to grasp. What you want in the bedroom, if we’re to marry, is secondary. I do want to hear your desires and interests, but it’s my desires, and my interests that will be most important once we marry.”
“Think of it this way. In our relationship, I will first ensure my needs are met, then I will look to your needs. Needs are true needs, not desires. A true need might be fidelity, to be treated with respect, to feel loved, to feel seen and heard, etc. After your needs are met, then I will see to my desires, and then, if you are a good boy, I’ll look to your desires.”
“I expect that, on the whole, you will be a good boy for me. But it is unlikely that you will always be good. I am not predicting failure, just being realistic. I need to know that you understand this relationship paradigm and still agree to submit. It isn’t my intent to trap or deny you. But we will do only what I want, when I want it, in the manner I want it. If your desires are being met by me, it is because I want it, not because I feel obligated; which I do not. Please me, and what I’ll want is to please you in return. My wants, as they relate to your pleasure, will be advised by your desires and interests, but they’ll not be held hostage to them. You’ll do what you’re told, sexual or otherwise, or it’s over. And this paradigm applies to our life together, not just our sex life.”
I watched him as he looked away, staying silent, pensive. I continued, but now in a more upbeat tone, “I agree, let’s discuss some more, and play some more. I’ve an idea to help make sure we’re on the same page. And I realize, being on the same page may mean marriage isn’t an option for us. But it’s important that there be no major surprises later”.
His head tilted back to look at me questioningly and I offered a tentative smile before leaning over to kiss him while reaching down for the massive wood I hoped he still had.
